You’ve gone through a rough time, experienced a huge set back; some curve ball that was thrown at you in your recent past and you are struggling to overcome it. Until then you had some ups and downs, some mediocre moments and were chugging along life’s pathway and then, from nowhere, you got stumped.
Does this type of scenario ring any bells for you? So many things can throw us off our game; sudden tragedies and external forces that we have no control over; occurrences that seem to have such a grip on us that we can’t move beyond them. And perhaps the only way you know to cope is to look for the nearest hole to hide in or to bury yourself under other distractions.
Here is statistical data showing the top 15 most stressful life occurrences. If you have experienced 1 or some of these, have you coped in a way that aids your wellbeing or in a manner that has left you unwell?
Here are some tips that will aid your recovery and direct you towards picking yourself up.
1.Find and surround yourself with people who truly support you empathically, meaningfully and in a way that makes you feel held. If that person doesn’t exist in your family and friends circle, consider seeking out support groups or professionals you can speak to.
2.Regardless of the trauma, there are always tiny blessings given to you in the chaos. Seek those out as they offer you little lights of hope and reassure you of the many ways you are still blessed.
3.Label your emotion by giving it a name. In doing so, Dr. Matthew Lieberman (Neuroscientist) says that this simple trick helps the mind refocus by reducing activity in the emotional brain.
4.We choose our narratives that either heal us or inflict self-harm, by choosing to see the sorry side of life and how disadvantaged we are. You inflict negativity on yourself by self-loathing, but if you see the same circumstances as they are with new lenses, the opportunities they bring, the gifts they left you and the possibilities that await, you open yourself up to overcoming and moving beyond that deep pain.
5.Allow yourself quiet moments where you can reflect on the pain, the despair and loneliness. Feel it and embrace it. Face it, because pretending it isn’t there doesn’t serve you. Sitting with it, however, allows you to feel it in its totality as you prepare to resurface from that pain, a little more renewed, accepting and positively seeking.
Remember that adversity is part and parcel of the peak moments in our lives. It is normal, undeniable, heart wrenching but, most importantly of all, ‘overcomeable’. Without pain, we cannot delight fully and wholeheartedly in Joy.< Back